Sunday, April 16, 2017

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Post 1508. Monday April 17



Tales of everyday life in the coastal village of Amble Bay



We share a policeman with two other villages. He appears some days, but never at night because he doesn’t like the dark. That's why we started Neighbourhood Watch nightly patrols. There are four 'Nochers': Fred, Norm, Bill and...err..oh, me! It's my turn tonight and you're accompanying me.

Here’s my kit. A mobile phone, a torch which doubles as a truncheon, and my water pistol. What’s funny? A bugler’s hardly going to hang around to find out if it’s a Glock 45! Flighty Flora lends me her handcuffs. Don’t be put off by the pink fur. Once on, they’re impossible to get off, as I recently discovered! Don’t ask.

We've yet to catch a villain, although I almost arrested a fox for or trying to steal a chicken! Only kidding.

We are looking out for a thief though because a garden fork was recently taken from Fred’s shed. One of Norm’s gnomes disappeared (I suggested it had gone 'ome!) and Bill’s favourite underpants were stolen from his washing line. In each case, they were out patrolling when it happened. We are beginning to sense a pattern. Oh no, I left a bottle of whisky on my garden table. Hopefully, it’ll still be there when I get back.

So, if are you ready we’ll set off. Hey, where are you going? Stop! Oh please yourself.





Tomorrow I’ll be taking you to a concert by the Amble Bay Orchestra

To read a brief description of Amble Bay and see a scribbled map just click HERE

Previous episodes – A B C D E G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


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44 comments:

  1. Perhaps your night watch need to be more secretive about when they are on duty, throw off whoever the thief is.

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    1. Indeed. There's someting Fishy going on!

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  2. I can sense being there. Well done!

    http://darlamsands.blogspot.com/

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  3. This was so fun, I am loving this visit to Amble Bay! It's funny that things are being stolen from the guys doing night watch when they are taking their turn. Maybe they need to switch up their schedule a bit and see if the can catch the culprit! :-)

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    1. ...or call in Inspector Maigret! Cheers Josie

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  4. If it was Flora's night off what was she doing?

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  5. Seems like the work of Mrs.Who or was it the other one from A Wrinkle in Time.. :) LadyInRead @ MyRandRSpace - Day 17 & the Letter N

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  6. Hope you had a great weekend in Amble Bay. Were you drinking whisky before going out patrolling? Just asking.

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    1. I need to to boost my courage. It's scary out there!

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  7. I could put names to your post that might apply in our village. No Neighbourhood Watch here and no policeman shared with other villages although there is supposed to be a community policeman to be called. The nearest we get to the police is the sound of sirens when they rush to a road accident on the dual carriageway some miles away. The police helicopter has just been withdrawn and we have to share one based 50 miles away..

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    1. Sadly such is village life today. This sounds so like the situation where I (actually!) live.

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  8. Hi Keith - straight to the whiskey bottle - you'll miss out when you get back. I'm surprised Arthur isn't 'watching' with you all ... a fun post of Englishness at its best - but looking at Bob's comment above - life has changed so much recently ... cheers Hilary

    http://positiveletters.blogspot.co.uk/2017/04/n-is-for-notable-rare-breeds-natives.html

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    1. Oh no no no! He once reported a scarecrow for trespassing on farm land! Thanks Hilary.

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  9. Lovely, light post!
    And by the way, I have that bottle of whisky from your garden table! If you want it back, just do me a favour... keep us entertained with your interesting stories...hahahaha!
    ------------------------------------------------
    Anagha From Team MocktailMommies
    Collage Of Life

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    1. That's where it is! Along with the fork the gnome and the underpants?

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  10. Cufflinks, underpants, whisky? Has all the makings of a rowdy time.

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  11. Another enjoyable entry. There really is a novel to be made out of these characters and locations. I shall miss them when April is over.

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    1. Thanks so much. I'll have to give it some thought!!

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  12. Hopefully your whisky is still there when you get back. I'm not sure I'd want to meet the thief of underpants. ;)

    A to Z 2017: Magical and Medicinal Herbs

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    1. They are very decorative! Cheers Sara.

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  13. I'm sure the thief is just gardening... And is relaxing with the whiskey! Happy A-to-Z-ing.

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    1. ...and I'm sure the underpants are the perfect attire! hanks Ronel.

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  14. If someone's so desperate they need to steal underwear, I'd say let them keep them. And if they are the absolute bestest favorite underpants ever, I'd probably dry them inside in future.

    Phillip | N is for Naked Don’t be alarmed – or disappointed – there is no nudity in today’s post.

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    1. They are special, and reserved for special occasions...if you know what I mean!

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  15. Going by the looks of it, your whiskey wouldn't be there when you go home. :D

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    1. I know, you can't trust anyone these days, not even in Amble Bay!

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  16. A policeman who doesn't like the dark! Outrageous!

    Any homes for sale in Amble Bay? I'm packed and ready!

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    1. That's Amble Bay for you Toni! I'm sure we ncan find you a nice little cottage with roses growing around the door.

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  17. So are we to assume the gnome was a NAKED gnome? Makes one question Norm's taste in art!!! ;)

    Calen~
    Impromptu Promptlings
    A to Z Challenge Letter M

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    1. No, last time I saw it, it was wearing Bill's underpants! Cheers Calen~

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  18. Bill's favourite underpants? Garden fork? Norm's gnome? A nasty criminal's on the prowl, definitely.
    Watch out, yikes!

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    1. It's fast becoming the capital of crime!

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  19. The gnome had gone 'ome! I love it! I look forward to my daily chuckle here.

    You almost arrested a fox? Well did you at least solve the mystery in the Ylvis song... "What does the fox say?"

    Trudy @ Reel Focus
    Food in Film: Nacho Cheese-flavored Chips

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  20. Good homegrown solution. A good neighborhood watch will get the police out there when needed.

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  21. Who knew Amble Bay was such a hotbed of crime? Hope you catch the underpants filcher!

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  22. Such serious crime in town, and a policeman who's afraid of the dark. What a worry!

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